


I Service You

by teacuptribbles



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Engagement, Established Relationship, Fluff, Jadzia is alive, Julian POV, Julian and Jadzia brotp, M/M, Marriage, Post-Canon Cardassia, unadulterated fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 11:46:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15436368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teacuptribbles/pseuds/teacuptribbles
Summary: Julian and Garak navigate love and tradition during Cardassia's reconstruction.





	I Service You

Julian thought, for a while, that he would leave tradition behind.  


He was never much attached to his roots, anyway.When he finished medical school, there was only one residency he wanted, only one program he desired: the internal medicine residency with Starfleet Medical.He wanted to see the stars, touch new soil, learn new languages, interact with species whose biologies he could not even fathom.The firm, solid rock of Earth held very little interest for him.

If Julian wanted to examine it, it might occur to him that Earth held his parents and the landmarks of his childhood.The shadows of his broken relationships, academic failures, shame, and secrets all lived among the greenery of Terra.It was easier to leave than to till that soil all day…if he wanted to examine it.

He had no regrets, even when he ended up on the barren, war-torn Cardassia. 

Cardassia could not have been further from the England of his youth.Cardassian trees, which were thick and spiked like medieval maces emerging from the ground, did not drop their leaves.The sun was enormous and red, and to his amazement actual mirages appeared in midday.The waves of evaporating water that could look so deceivingly like streams and pools came and went before his eyes, an effect he had only seen in films before.Many of the animals were armored and sharp-clawed.If there was a Cardassian equivalent to the delicate and chestnut-colored fallow deer, he had yet to see it. 

The dust was unreal.For thousands of years the dust storms had been legendary.After the Dominion unleashed a fleet of radioactive bombs, an event Cardassians referred to as the Fire, the vaporized buildings and tree roots unleashed the dust with a fury.It came up in massive clouds with the slightest gust of wind, seeping into homes and lungs.Julian spent a lot of his time fitting filtering masks and performing respiratory treatments for patients with red lung.

The people had drawn Julian in.He had always been the rare Terran who liked Cardassians.They were strong and witty and certainly unique.Cold-blooded humanoids, literally and a bit figuratively.There was no question in Julian’s mind that no one, not even the historically fascist and cruel Cardassians, deserved the radiation that had killed so many so horribly.But not everyone in the Federation felt the same way, and with every shipment of aid supplies there was a senator saying _Even after all they’ve done to Bajor?_

He could understand that at first, but he knew Cardassians.He knew the parentless children with missing hands and feet, the pregnant women terrified of giving birth without the assistance of their cherished family midwives, the elderly clinging to life with so much charred skin.So he toiled on, cleaning and medicating and begging the Federation for more help with so much fervor that his closest friends wondered what the hell he was doing. 

_Julian, not that I don’t admire you for what you’re doing, but I can almost smell you over the screen,_ Jadzia had said in that teasing-but-not-teasing way she did so well.

_Showering is a luxury we can’t afford here yet._

_“We,” huh?_

If Julian were to be honest with himself, he hadn’t exactly stumbled onto Cardassia.Yes, he wanted to help.Yes, he wanted the experience.Yes, he believed he would be an asset.But above all of that, Cardassia had Garak, and Julian was not going to let him go this alone.

For years, Julian and Garak had loved each other in a way that never required saying it.They would bicker and exchange little gifts and work side by side, anything but say “I love you,” and that suited Julian just fine.At times he felt like he could bust with the need to say it and, if Garak’s tight breaths and turning away were any indication, he felt the same way.But from the moment they met their relationship was a dare, a bluff.Julian’s need to get Garak to show his cards first was a prime motivation for coming to Cardassia…if he were to be honest with himself.

When Julian arrived on the planet, though, he found the rules of the game had changed.Maybe Garak had relaxed, the vestiges of his worst memories at his feet, or maybe he was raw from ever-present hunger and suffering.He was somehow older and younger, and dared to say the phrase “I hope.” 

During their first night in bed together since the war, they lied nose to nose, and Garak said _“Pokor çadav-ra edek.”*I service you._ Long ago, before Julian truly knew Cardassians, he would have found this declaration sterile.He would not have understood that pledging service to the individual, rather than the whole, was the most serious and frightening thing a Cardassian could do.

He repeated it back.He must have really butchered it, causing Garak to chuckle.Cardâsda was full of hisses and rasping sounds humans had great difficulty making.When he asked Garak what he had actually said, Garak only smiled and shook his head. 

They spent their days working.During the daylight hours, Garak met with a group of professors from the university.With their limited resources, they studied democracies across the quadrant and discussed, often heatedly, what the Cardassian public would accept and what they would not.They interviewed citizens and gathered volunteers to help them rebuild the capitol.

Alongside a small group of Cardassian physicians, Julian served as Cardassia City’s internist, pediatrician, psychiatrist, obstetrician, and even dentist.He commed the Federation daily to ask for healthcare professionals.Each time he was assured that Starfleet was doing everything it could to rally volunteers.

At dusk he and Garak would meet at the remains of Enabran Tain’s home.Having been a sprawling mansion in a gated area outside the city center, the foundation had survived, as had a few of the walls.  Aside from the pragmatic reasons, Julian suspected this was cleansing for Garak, a way to confront the memory and loss of his father.  Together they would dig through the rubble to find salvageable materials and lay brick before retiring, exhausted and caked in dust, to the nearby shipping container they called home. 

It was on one such evening that they sat in the dirt and watched the sky.Garak said, to Julian’s complete lack of surprise, that he had never done this before, contemplate the stars.Julian pulled him close as he pointed out planets and constellations.Garak was draped in a poncho-like garment, while Julian was in his underwear and still altogether too warm.

Garak pulled out a little gray box and handed it to Julian.When Julian opened it, he recognized it immediately.He had seen enough of these stainless steel rings on his patients to know.  Always ones for utility, these were what Cardassians used to announce betrothal. 

He had better sense than to ask Garak where he had procured it, as such rings were usually family heirlooms.He would learn later that Garak had purchased it a long time ago.

“I thought about doing something entirely more English for you but, alas, there are no diamonds here.”

Julian slipped the ring on his left ring finger.It fit perfectly--not that he expected any less. 

Garak rose his brow ridges in anticipation.“So my dear, is that a yes?”

“Just checking the fit,” Julian responded, and gave Garak a wink.

When Garak was asleep, Julian took pictures on his padd and sent them to his friends back on Deep Space Nine.Jadzia responded with a text message that was a wall of innumerable exclamation points, followed by CALL ME IMMEDIATELY.He received a call from Nerys the next day, who asked him only, “Are you sure?”Yes, he responded, he was sure.

Julian waited for the right patient before asking.Someone talkative, sweet, not too ill.While prescribing water, _rokassa_ juice, and frequent urination for an elderly woman with a mild renal infection, he asked about the shining ring on her finger.

She smiled and turned her hand to get a better look.“My engagement ring from my late husband.He died of cancer before the Fire.Does your culture have something similar?”

Julian did not wear anything below the wrist when he was working, so his true intentions were known only to him.“Very similar.What are Cardassian weddings like?I’ve never been to one.”

The woman inhaled deeply before exhaling through pursed lips, as though preparing for a grueling task.Julian tried to hide his disappointment as she described a three day long event with multi course meals and halls full of extended family. _Looks like I won’t be able to give Garak a Cardassian wedding._

He had never wanted a traditional wedding himself.Being forced into a suit, standing in front of an altar, seeing family he hadn’t seen in years and didn’t like.Nothing about it appealed to him.

There was one thing he wanted to do, though.

He called Jadzia.

_“I need to ask you a big favor.”_

_“Do you want me to officiate?”_

_“We’re not that far, Jadzia.Can you replicate something for me?”_

He sent her a number of photographs. 

_'That’s really sweet of you.I haven’t replicated something like this before though.I hope I can make something as beautiful.”_

_“I’m sure you’ll do great.A Vulcan nurse named Sanek is currently on DS9 and will be coming to volunteer later this month.We’ve been talking.You can give it to him.”_

_“Of course.What would you do without me?”_

_“Thank you, Jadz."_

Julian’s heart raced with excitement when he saw Sanek two weeks later.He was thrilled to have a good nurse, and eager to see what Jadzia had made.

With Sanek available to manage a few cases of malnutrition and dehydration, Julian went home after twelve hours for the first time since practicing on Cardassia.He prepared a fish stew on their small propane stove and opened the wine Sanek had also brought him, courtesy of the Siskos.

When Garak walked in, shaking the dust from his boots, he found Julian on one knee.He brought his hand to his chest.“Julian Bashir, what do you think you’re doing?”

“Showing you the proper way to propose.”

When Julian was in high school, his mother called him into her bedroom.She was looking over a box of jewelry and pulled out a ring for him to see.It had been in the family for years, she said, and she would like him to give it to a special girl one day.It was an art deco style, with a thick band of gold and fleur-de-lis like designs surrounding an emerald cut diamond.It just bordered on gaudy, but Garak walked the line between stylish and garish so well.

Garak paused and blinked several times before speaking again.“It’s…marvelous.Where did you get it?”

Julian smiled.“Jadzia made it for us.”

Garak’s body began to show the signs of the onset of an anxiety attack.His eyes widened, his mouth tightened down, and his chest exaggerated its rise and fall.Julian leapt to his feet and wrapped an arm around Garak’s shoulders, using his hand to rub Garak’s upper arm.He guided him to the floor.

He buried his nose in Garak’s hair as Garak breathed into the curve of his neck.This was a common situation for them, and Julian knew what to say.“I’m not going anywhere, Elim.”

That night they decided to watch the sky again, their fingers intertwined.Every now and then Garak’s ring would glint in the moonlight and catch his view.After attempting and failing to get Garak enthusiastic about Deep Space Nine shimmering in the distance, Julian curled as much of his lanky body as he could around Garak’s frame.“What are you thinking about?”

“All of the wedding gifts I can’t get you.”

Julian laughed and shook his head against Garak’s shoulder, earning a gentle slap on the arm in return.“Don’t laugh, Julian.It’s depressing.”

“A lot of things are depressing right now, but not this.”

“No,” Garak agreed, after some consideration.

They talked about weddings and all the assets they didn’t possess and family they didn’t have.On a Federation planet they would need to file a marriage license, but they were not on a Federation planet.They were on a planet that didn’t have a current governmental body, let alone a civil court. 

Maybe one day they would have the large hall wedding with flowers and candles and poems.Maybe—assuredly—the next time they could visit their old space station, Jadzia would have a party and table full of gifts waiting for them.Nerys would be there as well, saying Jadzia had roped her into it, but she would be smiling. 

“So are we married then?,” Julian asked, breaking the silence that had fallen over them.

He looked at Garak's profile closely.  A few gray hairs had appeared among the black.  He remembered the first time Garak noticed them.  He had frowned and said, "I was always told this was a proud moment in a man's life."  His scales had developed a brownish tinge due to the constant sun and sand exposure, and he had lost quite a bit of weight.  They both had.  They were, they often laughed together, a sorry sight.  

Garak turned his overlarge, blue eyes to Julian.  “Yes my dear, for all intents and purposes, I believe we are.”

The moment could have carried with it the taste of disappointment, the feeling that what had transpired was not what was dreamed about.Maybe his friends would feel left out.But he and Garak had their lives on Cardassia for as long as either of them could imagine, and what was the Cardassian way of life if not one of service. 

Julian thought of a line from an ancient American film, a film he liked very much: _“The problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.”**_  

As the night went on, Garak began to doze against the open frame of their shipping container, holding Julian’s hand in his.Julian stared into the distance.A breeze caused Garak to shiver and dried the sweat on Julian’s brow.The wind must have been stronger on the other end of the province, for a large cloud of dust rose against the sky, coloring the evening landscape a shade of maroon.

Despite its crimes and its scars, Julian had to admit he lived in a beautiful place.

Under his breath, he practiced a phrase he was determined to get right one day. 

_Pokor çadav-ra edek._

_I service you._

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> *A Cardassian phrase I made, using this website as a guide for vocabulary and grammar: http://stexpanded.wikia.com/wiki/Card%C4%83sda
> 
> **From Casablanca.


End file.
